"Do more of what you love!"

A few days ago I had the feeling I should go onto twitter. Which is kind of funny, even though I still have a twitter account I don't really go onto twitter anymore. I started to find that it was becoming to negative and a lot of politics. Don't get me wrong I understand the importance of knowing what is going on in the world, but lately I just want to be able to view it on my terms. So when I went click onto twitter the first thing I see is this post.....

This post really stuck with me.  I know it wasn't, but it felt like this post was meant for my eyes.  "Do more of what you love!", there is so many aspects of this that really hits home. Why not do a job that you like and maybe even love rather then just going through the motions.  To be honest I don't mind my job, but sometimes it feels like I just go through the day.  The passion is not there, just go to work do the job and go back home.  I like aspects of my job, but honestly I am not crazy about working for big corporations anymore. Recently a friend of mine has brought up another job I can do, I think I would be good at it.  I know I can do it, but to be honest I don't have the drive to do it. I feel like it would feel like that it would be another job to me, no excitement.  I find that I am struggling with the feeling that my job/career should be bring me some joy and I am not just doing it to earn an income.  Yes I understand that you need money to support your family, to pay bills, but why can't it also offer more. Why not be able to do your job and be able to enjoy it.

So here I sit, laid off due to covid looking at this post, re thinking my life. It is like a little midlife crisis. What do I love?  I really miss being creative.  Being able to do more photography, crafts, or working with my hands more.  To be able to find inspiration in the world and be able to make some money off of it would be a bonus.  As much as I want to push myself in that direction, the self doubt is there going " I don't know if I can make a living off of it... maybe I should just..." The little voices in my head, lack of self confidence gets the better of me. I won't know what I am capable of doing unless I try. 

So here I sit finding myself going back to that twitter post...  Really why don't I do more of what I love, instead of going through life mindless and just going through the motions. Really what do I have to loose, nothing...

Hilary